Author Archives: Mikey

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About Mikey

The 70's brought us many wonderful things. Star Wars, shag carpet, the Bee Gee's, the Brady Bunch, and most important his royal largeness Mikey. Delivered to us in the middle of the night on a bed of twinkies from the gods of cakes and pies. Mikey has been a Ventura County resident for close to 16 years now. He took an oath to bring down the establishment, fight the power, and deliver man-kind from evil. He of course put that all on hold for awhile in order to bring you the best in food reviews from all around California and especially from Ventura County. So food establishments beware, he is coming to your restaurant with his face of fury, you better serve it hot and there better be some gravy on it!

Sex, Lies, and Mini Sirloin Burgers

by Mikey

We are starting a new feature here at EatMeCalifornia.  We want to find out if all these fast food superpowers think we are all just food gobbling idiots who don’t pay attention to what their product is supposed to look like.  I’m tired of seeing commercials and pictures of food that does not exist here on Earth.  The videos and photos that they are showing us, which entice us to give their next big meal a try, are misleading.  Now, of course we already know that the man wants us to buy his 6 dollar burgers and will show us sexy burgers all covered with tomato, onion, and cheese.  What the man doesn’t know is that I’m showin’ photos of the real burgers right here.  I’m going to prove that their beauty queen, sexy burgers are really malnourished, meth addicted, second cousins twice removed.

The first meal in my scope is the mini sirloin burger from Jack in the Box.  Jack in the Box is definitely on the front lines of marketing, with pretty great commercials featuring mini cows and cowboys and even including a damn catchy jingle.  But is it all based on a lie? Continue reading

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Deadliest Catch – Deadline

by Mikey

So with the absence of Hells Kitchen and Brian’s new devotion to teaching the homeless how to make origami swans, I have now taken over the Deadliest Catch report.  Sorry (mommom1) your attempts to have me banned from writing have only worked in Tularosa, New Mexico and don’t get a big head, they just went along with you because I once said Tularosa smells like mayonnaise.  On to Deadliest Catch!

This episode labeled “Deadline” marks the last few days of king crab season. Up next is the Opilio season, which is an awesome time to watch this show.  If you missed the first part of the season it’s a great time to jump on.

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Pulled Pork = Tri Tip?

by Mikey

A new bbq joint opened up not too far from me, so you know I had to check it out.  Plus, the place has my name stamped on it, so I had to find out if it was worthy to be a part of the Mike empire.  I’m on the fence with this one folks.  This place kinda left me confused, bewildered, and just a touch bamboozled.

Big Mike’s Smokehouse – In Ventura on Telephone Road near Saticoy

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Filed under Ventura, Ventura County

Alaskan Style Pizza?

by Mikey

As you all know, B and I just finished up a trip to San Francisco to get my hoopty.  On our way back down south I wanted to get B to this pizza place called the Klondike Café.  It’s a cool little joint in the town of Arroyo Grande.  They have some great pizza and a really great atmosphere.

Klondike Café – Arroyo Grande: Take Grand Ave Exit off the 101 North

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I’ve known about Klondike for a while.  I used to live in Arroyo Grande for a few years and have a couple of good places we will be adding to the EatMeCalifornia map.  Klondike Café is a stop you should definitely add.  They are in the basement of a building on Grand Ave, in the little old town of AG.  It’s Alaskan style pizza in a very cool tavern-like atmosphere. Continue reading

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Filed under Arroyo Grande, San Luis Obispo

Hell’s Kitchen Finale!

by Mikey

Beware.  There be spoilers ahead!

We have finally reached the end for Season 5 of Hell’s Kitchen and I gotta say, it’s about time.  This has been a rough season to watch, mostly because of the lack of talent and the abundance of the mentally challenged.  Let’s kick it off with a recap of last week.

I’ve learned my lesson with Hells Kitchen and didn’t bother posting a Hell’s Kitchen article last week.  Knowing ahead of time that they always do the most to stretch it out, I thought it would be a wasted article and as usual (except for the time I jumped that rod iron fence in baggy shorts) I was right.

In the first part of the season finale Danny and Paula begin to design their restaurants.  Paula is going for more of a bistro, while Danny seems to be leaning towards Danny’s fish and beer. Continue reading

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Deadliest Catch – Long Haul, Short Fuses

by Mikey

We are steamin’ through King crab season and this episode, appropriately named, shows the stress and the strain of being stuck with the same dudes working a 36 hour shift.

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Can you imagine having to work side by side with that guy in the office that likes to quote lines from Spaceballs, or the dude that finishes every sentence with, “Can I get a what what?” Continue reading

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Deadliest Catch – Put Up or Shut Up

by Mikey

We are into week 4 of the King Crab season and the best part of this last episode, and by far the best part of this season, was the advertisement they had for the Deadliest Catch mother’s day marathon.  There’s nothing quite like Captain Phil saying, “Happy Fucking Mothers Day”. Of course it’s the discovery channel so they bleeped out the best part but it was still great.

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