The Final 3 on Hells Kitchen

by Mikey

We are nearing the finale and thank goodness.  This has been a rough season to watch.  I think Gordon may have to do a Hells Kitchen from somewhere else and find a new talent pool.  This whole season I’ve been comparing these guys to the Top chef contestants and maybe that’s my mistake.  Maybe they really want that whole rags to riches thing to happen.

last-31

We start off from last week waiting for whatever surprise Gordon has for them.  Again, I was hoping it would be Rampage Jackson blasting out of the kitchen to fight the last 3 finalists, but instead it was just their families coming out to hug and cry with them.  This isn’t the kind of crying I like.  I want down home, American, why are you all rejecting me, I’m breaking down emotionally kind of crying.

We watch them all hug and make out for awhile as we all sit back in awe that Danny has a fairly good looking girlfriend.  They all give the last three a few atta boys, you can do its, and you are the chosen ones, and then they take off.

Bright and early the next morning they are greeted by Gordon who tells them they need to pick their signature dish and make 100 portions of it. They have 90 minutes and pretty much get right to work.  The only one who has any real issues is Andrea, of course, who panics and begins to talk to herself.  Next stop, fetal position holding herself muttering “everything will be ok.”

They all get their dishes done and then find out they will be serving 100 of the top chefs in L.A.  One thing about Gordon is that he does have some clout and to have all these people in the same room is a testament to that indeed.

Surprisingly, Danny is the loser with over 76% of the chefs not liking the dish at all.  This was Danny’s first real shot to the nuts so he dropped off his high horse from that point on.  Paula is the clear winner and gets the whole makeover thing, which leads to a guest shot on Good Day LA.  On the way over, the producers decide to make us think there is some kind of love connection between JP and Paula.  I’m pretty sure JP is in love with JP and there is no room for Paula in the relationship.

Meanwhile, Andrea and Danny get to iron the table cloths and clean the TVs that Paula is on.

The dinner service begins and with it we see one of my favorite things that Gordon does on this show.  He has each chef take a shot at leading the other two.

We start off with Paula, who apparently has no idea what carrot puree is.  She also struggles to shout out orders and is very timid.  She does rally a bit, just in time to switch with Danny.  Danny then shows us all he’s kind of literate, but has issues with talking and reading at the same time.  He also misses JP’s on purpose hurdle and Gordon has to step in.  Danny also rallies a bit towards the end just before the switch to Andrea.  Andrea was the best one to watch.  As she says, she puts on her “assertive panties” and starts yelling at Chef Scott.  Andrea missed a couple Gordon tests at the start and decided to fix that by sending everything Chef Scott makes back to him while yelling some kind of inspirational quote. “You cook the dish chef it doesn’t cook you”.

Andrea grabbed a saddle and tried to ride Chef Scott, who we all could tell was getting pissed off.  He gave the best quote of the night with, “I’m going to punch her in the face.”

Personally, I have no idea how he made it, I would have slapped her with a crab leg, and beat her with some salmon.  Here’s to you, Chef Scott, for just getting through her screeching voice.

Dinner service ends and we all see that none of these people should be heading up a multi million dollar restaurant.  But out of the three, Danny and Paula should be the finalists.

Gordon sends them upstairs pleased with dinner and they start to pick someone for elimination.  Andrea picks Danny, Danny picks Andrea, and Paula picks Andrea.  Cue the respirator, call the doctor, Andrea is on her last breath.  Chef Ramsey takes her jacket and I hope to Moses that somebody kicked her and her panties out of the building.

Good things coming this week on EatMeCalifornia. I, for one, have had the best fish taco of my life and I will tell you where.  In addition B and I will be heading to San Francisco this weekend to catch the A’s and some good Oak-town food.  Keep checking back.

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